Lipstick Answers

This is my beginning of my story. It’s not my real name it is all fictional but any tips or comments would be appreciated Thanks all!
Adrenaline races through my body as the blade neatly slices through my light coffee colored skin, blood rushing to the scene of my committed crime. This hasn’t been the first time I’ve committed this offense, I can’t remember the first time I did it. The only thing I remember is how relaxed it made me feel as I watched my very own blood trickle down my arm, creating a sensation that nobody but us, self injurers would ever understand. After two more cuts, I stop for a moment admiring my artwork or my “real” tattoos as I call them. A few silent moments have now passed & the blood has subsided. I feel so much better now, like a strong release of emotions have been set free my body.
Metaphorically, my body is a prison. Emotions & I are the prisoners trapped within my body, I being punished for a crime that I did not commit. Nor do I even know what it is. My emotions have just been released from this body, the only way that I knew how.
After I wash the blade & put it away I silently pull my black colored long-sleeved arms down. Letting them hide my shameful secret, a secret that only I, Amber Loraine Dawson am supposed to know. After doing so, I unlock my bathroom door & slip back into the real world.
As I walk into the kitchen I notice that the whole family has sat down to breakfast. Melanie, my little sister is carefully spreading peanut butter on her toast, making sure to get every inch covered without getting her fingers messy. Dad is sitting quietly reading the newspaper & drinking his coffee. He is wearing his suit & tie that was just washed & ironed yesterday. Today he’s going to court to defend his clients. This is his job as a lawyer, trying to stand up for people thought to have committed crimes, so that day by day there will be one or two fewer criminals to be served a lengthy sentence. And mom is painting an easel. Blue skies, Green grass… yadda, yadda, yadda, a perfect world. Looking at my family for a moment it seems like the three of them would make a perfect family. The second I walk in, the perfect family is gone & chaos takes over.
“Amber go change into something different.” Mom says to me “I will not let you go to school dressed like that” I stop pouring my juice & look up at my mom. My brown eyes looking her straight in the eyes “Like what?” I dare, testing to see how far she will let me go before giving me a well deserved smack across the face. I know very well what she means. The black eye liner, the dark plum colored lipstick, the dark clothes & the black nail polish that I so neatly applied to my fingernails. “Amber you are dressed like a goth. Your mother & I will not accept that. We don’t like that look on anyone, especially our sixteen year old child.” My dad tries reason. Well mom & dad welcome to the real world it isn’t all sunshine & roses anymore I want to scream. I refuse to let my parents win this one. Without even bothering to put the cap back on the juice or put it away, I grab my schoolbooks off of the table, put on my Chuck Taylor Converse shoes & walk out the door making sure it slams loudly behind me. This is my reply to my parent’s response. You don’t have to accept it, I think to myself, nobody does.

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